So that happened.
But you're in luck random readers! I am not approaching this with a sad attitude! No, no! I am DEFINITELY cracking up about this because, c'mon...it's funny.
So Friday night I hung out with one of my first friends I made at college and my old roommate (who happened to be BFFs). It had been a long while since I had seen them and when they came to the viewing it brought back a lot of great memories. I really miss these girls!
After work, I headed up to Annapolis to hang out with AC* and TD* and I was really excited for the evening. The plan was that we were going to a club in DC where Lebron James just happened to be celebrating his birthday. Ummmm.......EXCITED! I was feeling really good about everything because I had some awesome outfit options and my hair looked really good. And it didn't hurt that I got flirted with on route 50. (Hey, I'll take my victories where I can get them)
I made it up to Annapolis and AC and I had some quality chatting time (TD was still at work) as well as primping time. Now, the outfit options I had: one was kinda safe and the other wasn't. Now you should know this about me: I am OBSESSED with rompers. Like, it's almost a problem, haha. I think I have 7 now? One of them is this SUPER cute one that I had gotten from ASOS (again, OBSESSED)
Cute right? Very Katy Perry.
So, when I tried it on I was a little shaky on it. The shorts are SUPER short and I've recently lost like 40 lbs so I'm not used to having a lot on display. But, I brought it with me because I'm trying to have a "who cares?!" attitude these days.
I showed it to AC and MC (the girls' friend) and they really liked it and encouraged me to have no fear. So, in very "FUCK IT" fashion, I wore it. But ya know, I was really feeling it. I felt good, I felt like I looked good, and it helped that the girl at the liquor store complimented my hair.
Little victories, people. Little victories.
Around 10:30 we start making the trek to DC with TD in tow. I couldn't wait to get to the club because I was so excited to go out with my girls and just dance and have fun! Nothing could get me down!
Then we get to the hotel we were staying at and I get out of the jeep. There were two girls sitting outside and they were just staring at me. I mean, they probably weren't but my neuroses these days is off the charts. So that made me nervous. Then we make it up to the room we were staying in....with a bunch of Ravens cheerleaders.
.........Do you hear that? That's the sound of my ego deflating like a damn balloon.
I chuckle and think to myself "Aaaaand I'm officially the fat friend" as I start tugging at my outfit. But, I try to stay positive and think it's still going to be a good night.
Then we get in the cab. I start to think, "Oh yeah....this is only the second time I've been out without my parents...oh shit....." and the anxiety starts to bubble (yeah...that's a new gift this situation has given me. awesome). The anxiety continues to bubble when we're inside because they are security guards everywhere and people trying to take our picture (I shit you not) and busboys running around like CRAZY. TD saw that I was kind of panicking and tried to talk me down. We eventually made it over to our VIP table where there were lots of bottles.
Ego, slightly recovered.
After that I really mellowed out and tried to enjoy the moment. I mean, I was at a super awesome club in DC with a VIP table and alcohol I didn't have to pay for! Plus, I was with my awesome friends and a bunch of attractive girls. And a famous person was coming. AWESOME!
Mr. James eventually made his appearance and when he did, the sea of blonde I was with gravitated over to his table (which was only one table away from ours). They made their way in and after about 20 minutes, the other half of our group (myself included) made our way in. Now, at this point, I've had two grey goose and cranberries and 2 glasses of champagne. I was feeling good. And I met Lebron's friend J. He was a very nice fellow. What he said, however, I couldn't tell ya. The music was loud and he was too soft spoken. But, he was fun.
Now, let me describe the scene for you. The booth was like a half moon shape. I was sitting towards the left hand side and Lebron was to my right with about 5 people in between us. There was also a bunch of girls dancing in front of all the guys. It was pretty full. But all was right with the evening...
Until it wasn't.
I can't tell you at what point these thoughts started happening, but, they happened. It was like I looked around and could tell that some of these people were on the "hunt". And I thought to myself, "I can't believe I have to do this again". And then I thought, "It's not fair that none of these people have to go through what I've just had to go through".
Then I fucking cried.
With Lebron James and his entourage sitting on either side of me.
I. Fucking. Cried.
TD would later tell me that J asked if I was okay and she told him what was going on. He apparently said "Oh my God! She is so strong for trying to come out and be normal!"
HAHA! "Try" is the operative word there.
.......*sigh*........I judge me.
The rest of the night was spent having a breakdown for an hour back at the hotel room and TD's boyfriend coming to pick us up at like 4 am to take us home.
The next morning I woke up and just shook my head, haha.
Who does this happen to? Just me.
