Sunday, January 19, 2014

"Her" - SPOILERS!!

This morning I saw the film "Her" by Spike Jonze and it was fantastic.

If you've been living under a rock for the past few weeks, here is the trailer so you know what I'm talking about.

I have to say, the trailer didn't really light a fire under my ass to go see it. I was intrigued but more so on a "meh" level. I mean, it was about a guy who fell in love with his computer. But I am SO glad that I went to see it!

This movie was beautiful on so many different levels; the story, the cinematography, the acting, all of it was just gorgeous. And it was beyond just some guy falling in love with an operating system. It was a person falling in love with a person whom was without a body. It was warm, so warm. The color of the film was rich with reds and browns, almost like a really saturated Instragram was placed over the camera. In fact, everything about the film was a bit hipster-ish. I laughed to myself and thought, "Ugh. So the hipster look will become earnestly sincere and not ironic in the future". Oh yeah- this movie takes place slightly in the future". There were a plethora of mustaches and high-waisted, wool pants that just did NOT work with me. They were a bit long in the zipper.

The writing. Oh God, the writing. It was so honest and beautiful and everything resonated on so many levels, especially for those of us who have been in long distance relationships. The phrase, "what would you do if I were there with you right now" is one that is a conversation staple. In fact, every time Theodore and Samantha had that conversation, my heart nearly fell out of my chest and tears pooled in my eyes. I still have those conversations. It sucks. The worst/best line that was the first to bring me to tears, was when Theodore described his feelings about his divorce to Samantha. He says (and I'm slightly paraphrasing because I don't remember the line verbatim), "I feel like I've felt everything I'm supposed to feel and I can't feel it again". Oh my God, NAIL ON THE HEAD, SPIKE JONZE! I just...wow.

The main caveat in Theordore and Samantha's relationship was the fact that she was without a body; that she wasn't "real". But I mean, is it really so far fetched to have a relationship with someone who may or may not be actually "real"? What makes a person real? The physical being of a person? Or the thoughts and/or feelings? Sorry, I'm getting a bit existential, but, that's what this film kind of does to you. Samantha points out that they are both billions of years old since they are both made of the same matter that was the result of the explosion that created our planet. So, I mean, is Theordore only a person because of his skin? Or is Samantha a person because she can feel feelings?

Also, removing the physical aspects of relationships leaves room for knowing the person on a much deeper level. You really learn how to fall in love with who the person IS, rather than the physical person. In my years in the dating game, I've had two relationships where the majority of our time was spent apart. The BIG one, you all know about. The other happened when I was 16.

I met this guy, A, at the beach and I initially told him that I was 18 because he was 22. We hit it off really well and we exchanged telephone numbers and I told him the following week how old I was. He decided that he found me interesting and wanted to keep talking to me (he lived in NYC). We talked almost every day for an entire year and had gotten extremely close. It was romantic in a sense but nothing to an extreme level. We just really got to know who the other person was to his/her core. We met face-to-face at the beach again and it was really weird. It was hard to hear him talk and to look at him. I found myself looking away whenever he talked because that's how I had gotten to know him- a voice. Eventually we got more comfortable but after that weekend, we've never seen each other again. We kept in touch for years after that but still never saw each other. He probably is one of the few people on this Earth that knows me on such a deep level. We really did love each other but it was such a different love than I've ever felt before and I think a lot of it was because of the absence of the physical. I used to say the same thing about Chris but that's a whole different can of worms.

If you've gathered anything from my blog ramblings, I hope that it's that you need to go see this movie. It really is something special.